Be Happier: 10 Things to Stop Doing Right Now

Happiness–in our business life and our personal life–is often a matter of subtraction, not addition.

Tom MC Ifle

Perbuatan-perbuatan salah adalah biasa bagi manusia, tetapi perbuatan pura-pura itulah sebenarnya yang menimbulkan permusuhan dan pengkhianatan.

 

-Johan Wolfgang Goethe

   

Be Happier: 10 Things to Stop Doing Right Now

 

Sometimes the route to happiness depends more on what you don’t do.  

  

 

Happiness–in our business life and our personal life–is often a matter of subtraction, not addition.  

Consider, for example, what happens when you stop doing the following 10 things:   

 

1. Blaming.

 

People make mistakes. Employees don’t meet your expectations. Vendors don’t deliver on time.  

So you blame them for your problems.  

But you’re also to blame. Maybe you didn’t provide enough training. Maybe you didn’t build in enough of a buffer. Maybe you asked too much, too soon.

 

Taking responsibility when things go wrong instead of blaming others isn’t masochistic, it’s empowering–because then you focus on doing things better or smarter next time.  

And when you get better or smarter, you also get happier.

 

2. Impressing.

 

No one likes you for your clothes, your car, your possessions, your title, or your accomplishments. Those are all “things.” People may like your things–but that doesn’t mean they like you.

 

Sure, superficially they might seem to, but superficial is also insubstantial, and a relationship that is not based on substance is not a real relationship.  

Genuine relationships make you happier, and you’ll only form genuine relationships when you stop trying to impress and start trying to just be yourself.

 

3. Clinging.

 

When you’re afraid or insecure, you hold on tightly to what you know, even if what you know isn’t particularly good for you.  

An absence of fear or insecurity isn’t happiness: It’s just an absence of fear or insecurity.  

Holding on to what you think you need won’t make you happier; letting go so you can reach for and try to earn what you want will.  

Even if you don’t succeed in earning what you want, the act of trying alone will make you feel better about yourself.

 

4. Interrupting.

 

Interrupting isn’t just rude. When you interrupt someone, what you’re really saying is, “I’m not listening to you so I can understand what you’re saying; I’m listening to you so I can decide what I want to say.”

 

Want people to like you? Listen to what they say. Focus on what they say. Ask questions to make sure you understand what they say.  

They’ll love you for it–and you’ll love how that makes you feel.  

 

5. Whining.

 

Your words have power, especially over you. Whining about your problems makes you feel worse, not better.  

If something is wrong, don’t waste time complaining. Put that effort into making the situation better. Unless you want to whine about it forever, eventually you’ll have to do that. So why waste time? Fix it now.

 

Don’t talk about what’s wrong. Talk about how you’ll make things better, even if that conversation is only with yourself.  

And do the same with your friends or colleagues. Don’t just be the shoulder they cry on.  

Friends don’t let friends whine–friends help friends make their lives better.

 

6. Controlling.

 

Yeah, you’re the boss. Yeah, you’re the titan of industry. Yeah, you’re the small tail that wags a huge dog.  

Still, the only thing you really control is you. If you find yourself trying hard to control other people, you’ve decided that you, your goals, your dreams, or even just your opinions are more important than theirs.  

Plus, control is short term at best, because it often requires force, or fear, or authority, or some form of pressure–none of those let you feel good about yourself.

 

Find people who want to go where you’re going. They’ll work harder, have more fun, and create better business and personal relationships.  

And all of you will be happier.

 

7. Criticizing.

 

Yeah, you’re more educated. Yeah, you’re more experienced. Yeah, you’ve been around more blocks and climbed more mountains and slayed more dragons.  

That doesn’t make you smarter, or better, or more insightful.  

That just makes you you: unique, matchless, one of a kind, but in the end, just you.  

Just like everyone else–including your employees.  

Everyone is different: not better, not worse, just different. Appreciate the differences instead of the shortcomings and you’ll see people–and yourself–in a better light.

 

8. Preaching.

 

Criticizing has a brother. His name is Preaching. They share the same father: Judging.  

The higher you rise and the more you accomplish, the more likely you are to think you know everything–and to tell people everything you think you know.

 

When you speak with more finality than foundation, people may hear you but they don’t listen. Few things are sadder and leave you feeling less happy.  

 

9. Dwelling.

 

The past is valuable. Learn from your mistakes. Learn from the mistakes of others.  

Then let it go.

 

Keep Smiling…

 

We know each other since 1981.We still united. May we keep Smiling and Shining…knowing you can always count on me.For sure thats what friends are for…In good times and bad times I be on your side…. Thank you for the trust and believing in me😀

 

May we keep Smiling and Shining…knowing you can always count on me.For sure thats what friends are for…In good times and bad times I be on your side….

 

Hope you are doing great Azera…;D Miss you babe…

 

Take Care…

 

My friends and cousins…that I love most😀.Amien…

 

Thank you for adding me in your friends list, I truly appreciate it the most. Thank you,thank you,thank you Jennana…Love you and your kiddos always in my heart ; )

 

The people I care and Love most

 

Gonna Miss you Girl my Movie Buddy…:D

 

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1 Comment

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One response to “Be Happier: 10 Things to Stop Doing Right Now

  1. Its like you read my mind! You appear to know so much about this, like you wrote the book in it or something. I think that you can do with a few pics to drive the message home a bit, but other than that, this is wonderful blog. A great read. I will definitely be back.

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